Results – MCW at The MCW Wrestleplex – 4/17/10
Posted on April 18, 2010 by Reverend Rogue Six
The Rev reviews MCW: April Ambush II on April 17, 2010 from The MCW Wrestleplex in Alliance, OH.
The MCW Heavyweight Champion, Christian Vaughn, decided to start the evening off by gracing the crowd with his presence. There was something different about him this night. . .couldn’t put my finger on it. . .oh wait. . .it was his hair! His hair looked normal! Which was kind of a pity, because I was starting to get used to it. . .and oh, yes, his little entourage wasn’t following him.
Evidently the champ had something on his mind, but it was hard to make it out, over the “VAUGHN’S A PUSSY” chants. I could hear something about his previous title thefts – I mean, defenses, and was starting to comment about his match with Brain Damage and some surprise news that he had, when MCW Commissioner Justin Diaz came out to the ring. While the crowd chanted “VAUGHN SUCKS DICK”, Diaz mentioned how odd it is that no one’s heard from Brain Damage this evening, and how “suspicious” it looked that Vaughn was out in the ring by himself. This prompted him to ask the question of the night (and this gets my Quote of the Night award for its timing): “By the way, Vaughn, where’s your whore?” After the crowd’s cheers quieted down, Diaz added that since Brain Damage wasn’t to be found, he had another idea; Vaughn interrupted, saying that he wanted to prove to the crowd that he was “a fighting champion”, and since he was scheduled to defend the MCW title, he’d defend it — against Justin Diaz. Just as Diaz accepted the challenge, Big Hurt appeared out of the back and nailed Diaz with a chair! Vaughn ordered Hurt to bring Diaz into the ring, where he put the chair over Diaz’s body, climbed to the top turnbuckle — and came off with a sick two-footed stomp on the chair! Vaughn then took the mic back, looked down on Diaz, and said “Guess I’ll see you tonight. . .”
Crew Spence took on Aero in the opening match. Now, I’ve always been an admirer of Aero’s, but I have to say that Spence impressed me a bit with his moves in this contest. He had quite an arsenal of offense, but he couldn’t seem to contend very well with Aero’s style of wrestling at times; he was even letting the crowd get to him as well. But after a mistimed move, Spence caught Aero and nailed him with what looked like a variation on Chavo Guererro’s Gory Bomb to score the pinfall.
Killer Sensation came out to the ring, and Chris Kole took a few moments for some obligatory trash talk about their opponents — the new team of the Young Studs: Eric Ryan and Bobby Beverly. Just as he called them out to the ring, the duo came out and hit the ring running. The Studs tried posing for the crowd a little too early after the opening volley of blows, and of course, they paid for that. Shane and Kole cut Eric Ryan off from his corner for several minutes (sound strategy, can’t argue with that), but when Eric got away and managed to tag in his partner, that’s when (to quote Jim Ross), business picked up! Things looked bad for the Studs just as Kole suplexed Ryan — but out of nowhere, Beverly rolled Kole up after getting rid of Shane and scored the upset of the night by pinning Chris for the 3-count!
From the shocked looks on the faces of Killer Sensation, I can say that they made one fatal error: they underestimated their opponents. I heard someone in the crowd say it best: “About time someone took those two down a notch. . .”
Wilbur Whitlock faced off with newcomer The Hawaiian Lion, who came to the ring sporting Samoan face paint and tribal tattoos on his upper right chest and shoulder. Lion didn’t seem all that impressed with Wilbur, who took control of the match right away. Lion had some impressive moves of his own, hitting a T-Bone suplex on Wilbur and lighting him up with chops and kicks that made me think of Jimmy Snuka, Ricky Steamboat, and a little of Samoa Joe in their style; he even surprised me when he hit Wilbur with a Hawaiian Hammer (I’d have said “Polish”, but. . .) after an Irish whip. Wilbur responded by going for the Whitlock Cutter, but ended up on the wrong end of a release suplex. Lion then caught Wilbur with a Roaring Elbow that did some damage, but when he went for it a second time, Wilbur hit the Whitlock Cutter again and scored the pinfall.
I have to say, I liked this Hawaiian Lion, and hopefully we’ll see more of him in future shows.
In what would be the most unique match of the night, Jebediah (with Dr. Dale Pierce)teamed up with Big Hurt and Mike Hercum to face the team of Luscious Larry Lavender, Krazy, and “Mr. Insanity” Toby Klein in a very off-beat six-man tag match that saw both teams huddle like football players, Toby using his tag partners as battering rams to clear the ring, a game of rock-paper-scissors between Larry, Krazy, and Toby to decide who’d start the match for their team, and more muggings then Central Park on a Saturday night. It seemed that the team of Jebediah, Hurt, and Hercum had the upper hand for most of the match, due to an easily-distracted referee, but after a Krazy Krunch on Jebediah and a “Shake, Rattle, and Roll” leg drop from Luscious Larry, the tide had been turned, and the team of Luscious Larry, Krazy, and “Mr. Insanity” came out the winners!
The Heavyweight Championship match looked like it was going to be a forfeit win for the champion (which I think was what he was hoping for, in my opinion), but to his credit, Justin Diaz did come to the ring, his ribs taped and in obvious pain, from the look on his face. Vaughn centered his attacks on Diaz’s ribs while spouting an endless stream of trash talk, but the Commissioner wasn’t going to just roll over and die; he managed to give nearly as well as he got, but every move cost Diaz a measure of pain. But regardless of how often Justin was hit, Vaughn simply couldn’t pin him! Diaz seemed to get a second wind, and began nailing Vaughn with everything and anything for several moments, until Vaughn hit Diaz with a gut buster that seemed to injure his knee. He laid on the mat, gripping his knee; this brought out several people from the back to lend aid. Something told me this wasn’t entirely kosher. . .there was something wrong with this picture. . .and just as Vaughn reached up and grabbed Diaz for a school-boy rollup and the quickest 3-count I’d ever seen in awhile, I knew I was right.
Justin looked visibly frustrated as Vaughn left the ring, and he wasn’t the only one; I heard numerous comments of “That’s BS” throughout the crowd, along with “he had that match won. . .”
I’m awarding Commissioner Diaz my “Iron Man” Trophy for his prowess in this match, holding his own, even though injured.
The rules for the 20-man Elite Championship Battle Royal were simple: you eliminate your opponents by throwing them over the top rope, and the last man left is the new MCW Elite Champion. Pretty much MCW’s Royal Rumble, but it would get the job done. . .
First to the ring came Isaac Alter, with MalachI and Mary in tow, soon to be joined by Supa Lucha.
The Battle Royal went like this: Big Hurt was next, followed by Chiyudo Ropa and Otis (who was eliminated by Hurt). . .Isaac Alter was taken out by Hurt as well. . .
Crew Spence came out, followed by Mike Hercum, who eliminated Ropa. . .then came Luscious Larry Lavender, Chris Kole, Hawaiian Lion, Eric Ryan, and Wilbur Whitlock. . . Spence was eliminated by Eric Ryan. . .Big Hurt was taken out by Luscious Larry. . . Jebediah entered next, followed by Bobby Beverly and then Krazy. . . Eric Ryan was eliminated by Chris Kole. . .and then out went Luscious Larry at the hands of — BIG HURT?
Sweet cream on an ice cream sandwich, where the blue hell were the refs?
Next came Nikki Skidz. . .then out came “Mr. Insanity” Toby Klein and then Shane Sensation. . .(man, it’s hard to keep this all straight, lemme tell you) . . . Lucha and Skidz were taken out by Shane Sensation. . .Aero entered next. . .Hawaiian Lion and Bobby Beverly were eliminated by Kole and Shane. . . Shane was then dispatched by Aero, and Krazy was removed by Wilbur. . .Chris Kole was removed by Aero, who then taken out by Jebediah, who was then dispatched by “Mr. Insanity” Toby Klein (who ended up taking himself out as well). . .Wilbur took out Mike Hercum — and just as it looked like we had a new Elite Champion, Hercum snuck in behind Wilbur with a chair, blasted him with it, and then rolled him out! The refs looked back to the ring and saw Hercum there where Wilbur had just been, then called for the bell and awarded Hercum the belt!! WTF??
As the boos rose in volume, along with chants of “BULLSHIT!”, Hercum celebrated his win – until Wilbur came back in himself and administered one Whitlock Cutter on the new champ. The crowd began to chant “TAKE THE BELT”, and from the look in Wilbur’s eyes, he was sorely tempted. . .but instead left it draped on Hercum’s chest.
An excellent show of restraint, Wilbur.
(You know something, folks — I try my best to remain impartial and unbiased when I review things. . .I really do. But even the Rev has his limits. I don’t think I’ve ever seen referees blow calls this badly since the last World Series that the Yankees won. . .I mean, good lord. . .and Logan Scott wasn’t even involved in this match! Gentlemen, due to your actions, I’m currently talking with the law firm of Dewey, Cheatum, and Howe about filing a class action lawsuit against the Ohio Referees’ Union for gross malpractice. You‘ll be hearing from them soon, mark my words.)
So we now have an Elite Champion. How long can he hold the belt — and who’ll be the one to take it from him?
Until next time, I’m the Reverend Rogue Six, and I’ll see you at ringside!
Results – MCW at The MCW Wrestleplex – 4/03/10
Posted on April 4, 2010 by Reverend Rogue Six
The Rev reviews MCW: April Ambush on April 3, 2010 from The MCW Wrestleplex in Alliance, OH.
The show began on a rather somber note, with a tolling of the ring bell in memory of former WCW/WWE wrestler Chris Kanyon, who had been found dead the day before. Kanyon was known first as the masked wrestler Mortis, as well as a partner of Diamond Dallas Page.
Following the moment of silence, Commissioner Justin Diaz and his assistant Dick Jeremy came to the ring, Jeremy carrying the new MCW Elite title belt. Diaz started off by explaining that last time he’d tried to explain about the new title, but had been interrupted by Mike Hercum; he wanted to try again. The Elite Championship was going to be awarded to the winner of the first Elite Elimination match, which would be a 20-man over-the-top battle royal. The last man left in the ring would then be awarded the belt. If any wrestler wanted to enter the match, he’d have to see Dick Jeremy — and they’d have to act fast, because there were only 20 spots. Then Diaz caught himself; “What am I saying? There’s actually 19 spots — because I’m the first entrant!”
Following the Commissioner’s departure, the familiar strains of Motley Crue began to play, heralding the arrival of Nikki Skidz — who seemed to have more bandanas tied on his boots then before.
Then Johnny Cash began to play, and out came Wilbur Whitlock, ready for action.
Nikki had several moments of excellent offense in the early going, even managing to knock Wilbur off a top turnbuckle to the floor, but cockiness began to set in with a lax cover on Wilbur after a DDT, then when Nikki went for a 2nd Russian Leg Sweep, Wilbur countered out of it and hit Skidz with the Whitlock Cutter for the win.
I’m giving this match my “Little Bit Country, Little Bit Rock-n-Roll” Award just for the pairing alone. And Nikki, a piece of advice — cut back on the bandanas. Not only were they slipping off your boots, the look’s been done.
Nick Andrews announced the next seven entrants to the Elite Elimination match — “Killer” Chris Kole, Shane Sensation, Aero, Crew Spence, “Mr. Insanity” Toby Klein, Isaac Alter, and Chiyudo Ropa!
“Jesus Loves the Little Children” began to play, and at first I thought Isaac Alter had a match. No, this time it was just MalachI, who apparently wanted to take some time for a brief sermon on Easter. But no one could hear him over the boos and jeers of the crowd, so thanks for coming, Mal. (Well, that was interesting. . .)
Crew Spence came out for the next match, and I’ve got to say, it looks like he keeps getting more tattoos. Then again, he also looks like he’s wrestling in his briefs (but I could be wrong). His opponent for tonight would be none other then Supa Lucha, who received a hero’s welcome as he came to the ring. The match started out with Spence making several attempts at an offense, but Lucha seemed to be 2-3 moves ahead of him every time! Lucha blasted Spence with a flurry of arm drags and dropkicks that left Crew on his back more then (insert your own metaphor here). Lucha then sent Spence out of the ring, but missed with a baseball slide that might have put Crew into the nearest wall, had it connected. Spence, however, began coming back with surprising moves, and even managed to survive Lucha’s flip Rock Bottom off the top rope. He caught Lucha and then set him up for what can be best described as a spinning Gory Special that dropped Lucha on his head and gave Crew Spence the win!
For that finisher, I’m awarding Crew Spence my “Damn, now THAT was impressive” Award.
Nick Andrews had more entrants to announce: Jebediah, Wilbur Whitlock, one of the Rootin’ Tootin’ Buckaroos (not sure which one), Eric Ryan, Nikki Skidz, and someone named Bobby Beverly (???). If you’re scratching your head on that last name, you’re not the only one.
Chiyudo Ropa came out for the next match, and his opponent would be — oh, Ropa got the fuzzy end of the lollipop on this one — Big Hurt, who came to the ring amidst chants of “SELLOUT”. Something told me that this match wasn’t going to be pretty, and as usual, I was right. Chiyudo tried his best to try to get something going, but Hurt’s sheer power was just too much for the masked wonder. Ropa got a few good shots in, especially with a Shining Wizard in the corner, but one inverted suplex later, Hurt got his hand raised, and Chiyudo was trying to remember where he was at and why he was there. . .
Dr. Dale Pierce and Jebediah came out to the ring, and it seemed that the good doctor had something on his mind; with the sounds of the crowd booing him like they had MalachI, well, damn if I could figure out what it was. It was probably something fairly profound, but – oh well. . .
Nick had some more entries to announce: Big Hurt, Luscious Larry Lavender, Otis (Otis??) Mike Hercum, Krazy, and Supa Lucha. And unless my math is fuzzy, that made the twenty.
Next out to the ring came the surliest-looking man on the MCW roster, Mike Hercum, who took it upon himself to shred a fan’s “Jobber of the Year” sign after reading it. Yeah, that’s the way to get the crowd with you, boyo. His opponent would be none other then Amityville’s favorite son, Krazy, who clearly had the crowd with him. As Krazy got in the ring, Hercum bailed out, earning himself a chant of “PUSSY”. (Sorry about that, Mike, but the crowd calls ’em as they see ’em)
Krazy led most of the match, which went out of the ring for several moments after a suicide dive from Krazy onto Hercum, and Krazy even nailed Mike with a missile dropkick that took him halfway across the ring. But it’s always that one mistake that can cost you, and for Krazy, it came when Hercum dodged a second missile dropkick; this was enough of an opening for him to slap on the sharpshooter — and Krazy finally tapped out.
I may be off here, but I’m giving this match my “MATCH OF THE NIGHT” Award. It was that good.
The next match was announced as a non-title match, so I had a fairly good idea of who one participant was. . .and when “Taking Care of Business” started to play, I knew who the challenger would be. Luscious Larry Lavender came out to the ring singing, and this time was rocking a gold and purple Elvis-style cape.
Next came the MCW Heavyweight Champion, Christian “Captain Hair” Vaughn, with his entourage of Minka Murder and Big Hurt in tow.
[I need to take a moment for an aside; I recently had a long chat with my father, Ol’ Rogue Five, and he had a confession to make -- some years ago, in his travels, he had an inadvertent fling one night with a peacock, but never knew if anything had come of it. So there’s a slight chance, by the way of his hair, that Christian Vaughn and I may just be *gasp* half-brothers! More to come on this. . .]
The crowd was ready for the trio, as chants of “VAUGHN’S A FAGGOT” alternated with “SHE’S GOT HERPES”.
Larry started off by going for the most obvious target — the hair. After getting it mussed up, Vaughn bailed out of the ring like a scalded cat and told Nick Andrews that he wouldn’t wrestle until his hair was properly fixed.
Oh. My. Lord. And this is the MCW Heavyweight Champion?
But I digress.
Larry went for the hair a few more times, sending Vaughn out of the ring. As a ten-count began, Larry stopped it, and took the mic (here I paraphrase): “Now I know what got Big Hurt to sell out the way he did. . .if you can see, Minka’s wearing a brace on one hand. . .looks like she’s been giving someone a little extra action — if you know what I mean.” Oh yeah, Larry, we got the message.
The Luscious One surprised me by the attacks he waged on Vaughn, especially the Randy Savage-style top-rope double ax-handle smash he gave Vaughn, but as always, when you wrestle the champ, it’s a 3-on-1 handicap; Minka and Hurt managed to interject themselves at key moments. (While this all went on, a brand new chant started that got under Minka’s skin: “CRABS JUMP SIX FEET”.)
Despite a valiant effort, Luscious Larry ended up getting pinned by Vaughn, and suffered a highly-unnecessary post-match assault by Vaughn and his loyal minion.
This brought Commissioner Diaz out to the ring, who said to the champ: “I hope you’re glad you didn’t have to defend the title tonight. . .because I wanted you to have a little warmup for the next show — where you’ve got a very special title defense coming up. . .and I think you know who it’ll be with. . .in fact, there he is!” The trio quickly looked behind them, and Diaz laughed as he said (amidst a hearty round of “VAUGHN’S A PUSSY”) “In two weeks, it’ll be — for the MCW Heavyweight Championship — Christian Vaughn versus Brain Damage!” Let’s just say that Vaughn didn’t take the news all that well. (Champ — were I you, I’d check my life insurance and make my peace with God. . .just in case.)
Dr. Dale Pierce and Jebediah came out for the main event, and Jebediah’s opponent for the evening was none other then “Mr. Insanity” Toby Klein. Toby got in the ring and immediately chased everyone — including the referee, who got a noogie – and then started chewing on the top rope. (I’ve heard of pre-match snacks, but. . .) The match began evenly, neither gaining an advantage for long; when Jebediah drove Toby’s head into the top turnbuckle, he stopped, gave Jebediah an “are you serious” look, then proceeded to drive his own head into the same buckle!
The match continued on, where it spilled out into the crowd. At this point, the doctor interjected (or is that injected?) himself and his favorite goat’s-foot cane into the mix by choking Toby with it. The fight went back into the ring and then out again, where Toby drove both Dr. Dale and Jebediah’s skulls together. At one point, Toby went up top, but Dr. Dale nailed Toby in the ribs — this gave Jebediah the opening to hit the Haybaler and pin Toby for the win.
What a way to bring in Easter. . .
The stage is now set for the crowning of a new champion – and might we see the dethroning of another one?
Until next time, I’m the Reverend Rogue Six, and I’ll see you at ringside!
NOTE: This review is dedicated to the memory of my personal mentor, a man who was instrumental in my life and helped me to find the Rogue within and release him. The Old Warhorse passed away on St. Patrick’s Day, and my life’s a little emptier now without my old friend. Chief, this is for you.
Results – MCW at The MCW Wrestleplex – 3/20/10
Posted on March 26, 2010 by Reverend Rogue Six
THE REV REVIEWS MCW: 10th ANNIVERSARY AFTERMATH on March 20, 2010 from The MCW Wrestleplex in Alliance, OH.
Things started off with Commissioner Diaz and his loyal minion, Dick Jeremy, coming out to the ring to announce about the upcoming crowning of the new MCW Elite Champion (in April, if memory serves me right). While this went on, out to the ring came Mike Hercum. Now, I have to admit, one thing had me a bit curious; Hercum was promised that if he defeated Diaz (which, technically, he did), Mike would “get the title [he] deserved”. My question was: What title? Certainly not the newly-minted Elite title.
He went into the rant I expected to hear, about how much he deserved the belt and how badly he’d beaten Diaz, yadda yadda yadda. This new attitude of Hercum’s, I must admit, is wearing a little thin, and from the boos of the crowd, I‘m not alone in my opinion.
Diaz and Jeremy wanted to obviously prove they were going to keep their word, and so gave Mike his belt. . .a cardboard and tin foil one!
Obviously, Mike didn’t seem to like his gift, bashing Diaz with the Elite belt and then locking Jeremy in the sharpshooter. Something tells me this isn’t over yet, not by any stretch of the imagination.
Supa Lucha took on the Unholy Acolyte, Isaac Alter (along with MalachI and Mary), in the first match. When Lucha went for a 450 splash, I thought “That’s it,” but he MISSED! Before Isaac could capitalize on this, Lucha quickly hit him with the Burrito Driver for the win. (No matter how many times I see that move, I’m telling you, it never gets old!)
Amityville’s favorite son, Krazy, faced off with Jebediah, who came to the ring with Dr. Dale Pierce (personally, I’m surprised both of them were able to recover from the Singapore Cane match 2 weeks ago). Just as Krazy had dropped Jebediah with a Krazy Krunch and was ready to pin him, Dr. Dale decided to get involved and jumped up onto the apron, distracting Krazy. This got him a knee in the spine from Jebediah, who finished him off to win the match. Apparently, this wasn’t enough for the two of them, as Jebediah nailed Krazy with the Doctor’s goat-foot cane and continued the post-match beating — until Mr. Insanity came out to even things up, armed with a Singapore cane, and sent both Jebediah and Dr. Dale running.
As if Mike Hercum hadn’t had enough fun in the beginning of the show, he took on the masked Japanese phenom known only as Chiyudo Ropa. Ropa started the mind games early, tricking Hercum into a game of “Patty Cake”, and when they actually went into a lockup — Ropa suddenly yelled “STOP!”. . .and went into an MC Hammer dance. This didn’t sit well with Hercum (small surprise there). Ropa’s Compton Kick managed to knock Mike to the floor; Ropa got him back in and went for a scoop slam — only to have Hercum slide off, nail him with a Flatliner, and lock on the sharpshooter. It didn’t take long for the masked man to tap out.
Nikki Skidz came out to face and get summarily annihilated by Christian Vaughn’s new minion, Big Hurt. Out from the back came Luscious Larry Lavender, and we ended up with a bonus match! When Larry got Hurt in a figure four (that I’d like to think Ric Flair would have liked), in came Vaughn, who raked Larry’s eyes to break the hold. Hurt nailed Larry with a slam, and just as Christian was about to blast Larry with the championship belt — Larry escaped, Hurt took the belt shot, and Larry pinned the big man for the win! (As it sayeth in the Book of Rogue, “Live by the scheme, die by the scheme”.)
Crew Spense (odd name, but what the hey, it’s his) took on Wilbur Whitlock in a fairly solid match, but it wasn’t to be Spense’s night; after exchanging turnbuckle shots, Crew managed to toss Wilbur over the top rope — or so he’d thought. He didn’t take the time to check to see if Wilbur had actually gone over. . .and he hadn’t. Wilbur had managed to catch himself on the apron and got back in to hit Crew with the Whitlock Cutter for the win.
In the Main Event, one-half of Killer Sensation — Chris Kole — took on Mr. Insanity in a match that began with impressive showings of both men’s chain and submission wrestling abilities. Further on in the match, just as Mr. Insanity had Kole for the pin, at the count of 2, out came Jebediah to break up the pinfall and start brawling with Toby. This got the match called as No Contest, and earned referee Logan Scott an abrupt meeting with a ring corner post (OUCH!) that left him bleeding.
I had figured that there’d be fallout from the Anniversary show, and I’m fairly certain this may be just the beginning. . .
Until next time, I’m the Reverend Rogue Six, and I’ll see you at ringside!
Results – MCW: X Anniversary Show – 3/06/10
Posted on March 8, 2010 by Reverend Rogue Six
THE REV REVIEWS: MCW “X” – 10TH ANNIVERSARY SHOW on March 6, 2010 from The MCW Wrestleplex in Alliance, OH.
There are, in life, those rare moments when you get to be a part of history. For years, you’ll look back on that certain moment and remember it like it was yesterday. On March 6th, 2010, over 400 people will be able to remember the night of MCW’s 10th Anniversary Show and the sights they witnessed that very night. And as for myself, I’m proud to count myself as part of this select group of witnesses.
The evening began with Nick Andrews coming out to get the crowd warmed up with a little “who’s-the-loudest-section” contest, and of course, the Riot Zone was in full effect. At one point in the contest, Nick asked “How is it that one little section is louder then the rest of the place?” A good question — my theory is that none of us drink THAT much Red Bull . . . But that’s my own opinion, yours may vary. Miss Sarah came to the ring (looking incredible as always) to get the first match started, and we were off and running.
Out first to the ring came one-half of the Rootin’ Tootin’ Buckaroos, Rex Rootin’. He was fired up and ready to go, even giving Miss Sarah a little Texas Two-Step. Motley Crue’s “Girls, Girls, Girls” began to play, heralding the arrival of Nikki Skidz — who had apparently given himself a bit of an image makeover; the “big hair” he’d been sporting for some time was gone (and the ozone layer thanks you for that, Nikki), and replaced with a spiked Mohawk/bandanna combo. He was even wearing bandannas around his legs and his boots (By the way, Nikki, Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson want to have a little chat with you; I’m told it’s something about copyright infringement…). What can I say? Sometimes, change is good.
Rex went on the offensive early, taking control of the match — that is, until he stopped to play to the crowd; this gave Nikki a chance to tag the Buckaroo with a low blow that slowed the momentum of the match for a bit. Rex managed to get off a sunset flip (which was a surprise), and Nikki managed to score several near-pinfalls on him throughout the match. When Rex went up to the top (albeit a little slowly) and went for a top-rope elbow rope, he crashed and burned instead as Nikki moved and rolled him up for the 3-count! SKIDS WINS! SKIDS WINS! BY GAWD! SKIDS WINS! (And that was my Jim Ross moment for the night.)
Big Hurt came out for the next match to a rather mixed response, due to his actions in the title match at the last show. Hurt had also changed his look a little, sporting an RVD-style singlet. “Taking Care of Business” started up, and out came Luscious Larry Lavender, wearing an Elvis-style cape. Not bad.
When he got in the ring with Hurt, I could see an obvious size difference, Big Hurt a head or so taller then Larry. But the crowd was definitely with Larry, so maybe that could give him an edge that he could use. . .
Larry seemed to be favoring a speed style of attack throughout the match, which seemed to work best when he could catch the big man off guard — which wasn’t all that often. Big Hurt was going with his favorite style of attack: power, sheer power. He also seemed to focus a lot of his assault on Larry’s back. (A sound strategy, can’t fault Hurt for it.) Larry did manage to catch the big man with several different moves, ranging from a swift enzugiri and neck-breaker that conjured up memories of the Honky-Tonk Man to even a Hot Shot off the ring apron. But after Hurt dropped Larry after catching him off the top rope, he slid out of the ring and got a chair from under the ring. Coming back in, he prepared to part the Luscious One’s skull with it, only to have Larry catch it in mid-swing, drop it to the mat, and DDT’d Big Hurt on it! The referee saw the chair in the ring, an unconscious Big Hurt, and immediately disqualified Larry, giving the win to Big Hurt! Hurt gave a post-match spine-buster to Larry, who knocked down the referee after he got up from the mat.
Mike Hercum came out for his challenge match against Justin Diaz, and from the look on Mike’s face, he was ready to fight. Diaz came out (okay, there’s no good way to write this sentence, so bear with me) next, followed by his “personal assistant” Dick Jeremy. Diaz started the mind games early, messing with Hercum several times as they tried to get going, even nearly kissing Mike on the tip of his nose! Hercum responded by slapping the taste right out of Diaz’s mouth, and Diaz returned the favor by sneaking a low shot in that left Hercum somewhat incapacitated for a few moments. Then things got serious. The momentum of the match was almost pendulum-like, swinging back and forth between both men, until Hercum was able to ground Diaz on the mat with a submission hold that put all pressure on Diaz’s back — his seriously-injured back. This sent Dick Jeremy into a sheer panic; He climbed up on the apron and attempted to distract Hercum with his “charms”, even going so far as to pull Hercum’s head into his chest (god, I needed a mental shower after seeing that — excuse me, I need another one just from the memory. . .there, now I feel better. . .) This, believe me or not, actually was enough of a distraction that allowed Diaz to execute a top-rope dive that took Hercum out. He got Mike back in the ring, and whipped him into a corner, where Hercum dropped to the mat. Diaz signaled for a Bronco Buster, and he hit it on target. Diaz then got him up and hit what looked like a double-underhook bulldog that drove Hercum into the mat — and from the impact, Diaz seemed to have paid for the move as well, re-injuring his back. As the ref checked Diaz over, he ordered Hercum back to a neutral corner — but Hercum pushed past the ref and wrapped Justin up in a sharpshooter, cinched it, and reared back. Dick Jeremy kept screaming “Stop it – he’s had enough!”, but Hercum refused to let go. The ref then signaled to ring the bell and awarded the match to Mike; I couldn’t tell from my vantage point, but I’m figuring that Diaz must’ve blacked out from the pain of the sharpshooter. As Mike celebrated his victory to a chorus of boos from the crowd, the ref and Jeremy slowly got Diaz out of the ring and took him to the back amidst cheers from everyone.
As things calmed down, Nick and Miss Sarah came back to the ring, Sarah carrying what looked like a new championship belt. This was the new Elite Championship belt, and we found out that a new MCW Elite Champion would be crowned in April. I don’t know about anyone else, but color me curious. . .
Super Oprah came out for the next match — and as I’ve said before, if you’ve never seen Super Oprah, words don’t capture her; Super Oprah must be experienced. That’s all I’ll say. Next came Jessicka Havok, much to the cheers of the crowd and much to Oprah’s dismay. Things started out with Super Oprah trying a few mind games on Jessicka, even going for (what I still call the most disgusting finisher ever seen) the Tampon Claw early. But Jessicka had the presence of mind to move — and the poor ref ended up taking the Claw
As both left the ring, the ring crew came out and began securing 4 Singapore Canes in the ringposts.
Dr. Dale Pierce (although Sarah referred to him as “Time Traveller” — don’t know why) came out, leading his man Jebediah to the ring. From the look on Jebediah’s face, he looked ready for a battle — then again, he usually looks that way, come to think of it. . .Dr. Dale was looking confident. Wilbur Whitlock came out next, to the cheers of the crowd and the strains of Johnny Cash. He got in the ring with Jebediah, and the match was on! Jebediah went on the attack early and kept at Wilbur, who stopped him with a spear that knocked him to the mat. This allowed Wilbur to get the first cane free, but he didn’t have it long; Jebediah got a hold of it and began using it on Wilbur. He dropped it, and got a fresh one for himself. At one point, Jebediah actually had a cane in each hand, and before you knew it, all 4 canes were in play. Jebediah even grounded Wilbur with a low shot, and broke out a move I hadn’t seen in awhile – the Garvin Stomp (I know the WWE calls it the “Orton Stomp”, but Ronnie Garvin used it first, so I’m going with the original name). Dr. Dale and Jebediah got Wilbur over the second rope; Dale held him in place while Jebediah administered an old-fashioned whipping across Wilbur’s back (and if you think it hurt to watch it, you’d be right!).Wilbur mounted a comeback, executing a perfect White Russian Leg Sweep (shades of the Sandman) on Jebediah, and even got him with a dive through the second and top ropes – armed with a cane! But when Wilbur inadvertently hit the ref while suplexing Jebediah, this let Dr. Dale in the ring, armed with his goat-foot cane. Jebediah held Wilbur in place as Dr. Dale charged with the cane – and at the right moment, Wilbur dropped down, with Jebediah taking the cane shot instead! Wilbur got a cane and parted Dr. Dale’s hat with it, dropping him, then hit Jebediah and followed with a Whitlock Cutter for the win! As the crowd cheered, Wilbur raised the cane in salute.
(For this match, I’m awarding Wilbur Whitlock my “Sandman Hardcore Icon” Award for his cane-swinging skill this night.)
Nick Andrews came back to the ring, and was joined by MCW Original GQ Status, who helped psych the crowd up even more.
They left the ring as Sarah came back for the next match, which was the 6-Way Cruiserweight Gauntlet match.
First to the ring was Krazy, then came Isaac Alter, along with Malachi and Mary (who was wearing a white choir robe — this was a welcome change from her usual garb, but white? C’mon, Mary, God’s gonna get you for lying. . .).
Krazy lit up Isaac early with chops, and nailed him with a flying Codebreaker just as Crew Spenser hit the ring — and good lord, was he wrestling in his briefs? — to join the party.
Next came Supa Lucha, who quickly took everyone out. The action spilled outside, where Crew went up and took out Krazy and Isaac with a dive — not to mention Malachi as well! Not to be outdone, Lucha went up and did the very same thing!(I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again — a MCW Cruiserweight match doesn’t need a ref as much as it needs an air traffic control tower!)
Next to the mix came Eric Ryan, as fights went out in and out of the ring. Supa Lucha nailed Isaac Alter with a Burrito Driver to score the first elimination — so long, Isaac, thanks for coming.
Eric Ryan then caught Lucha with a Buckle Bomb just as the final guest came to the party: Aero! Krazy, meanwhile, took out Spense with a Krazy Krunch to score the second elimination — so long, Spense, come back when you can stay longer. . . Four were now left in the ring. As they sized each other up, we saw the first “Round the Horn” knife-edge chop that went one way, then back again (there’s something you don’t see every day); next came a 3-on-1 group chop centered on Eric Ryan, who ate a Supa Lucha super kick to become the 3rd man eliminated. See ya, Eric! Aero caught Lucha with a Gory Special that Lucha got out of, and Krazy found himself on the wrong end of a rolling superplex from Lucha. Aero got Lucha with a second Gory Special for the 4th elimination; you gave a damn good fight, Lucha. Krazy nailed Aero with a top-rope senton, but in the end, Aero nailed Krazy with a spinning neck breaker to score the final elimination and win the Gauntlet match!
Matt “M-D20” Cross came out to the ring for the next match, dressed in full Roman Legionnaire garb — all he was missing was the armor and helmet. But on him, it looked good. When the crowd started barking, that meant only one thing: “Mr. Insanity” Toby Klein was coming to the ring. They started things off with a burst of chain wrestling that ended with a double kip-up and a round of applause from the crowd. Cross drove Toby’s head into the turnbuckle — which made Toby stop, pause, and then drive his OWN head into the buckle several more times. You could see the look on Matt’s face — “What the hell did I sign on for?” The match spilled out of the ring and around the crowd, who got to participate in things by holding each wrestler for a few chops. Toby got a vaulting Hot Shot off on Matt, who then caught Toby with a Death Valley Driver in return. Moments later, Matt then went for his split-legged moonsault, only to eat nothing but canvas; Toby hit his corkscrew splash for the pinfall. After the match, Toby offered a hand to Matt and helped him to his feet in a show of respect.
All this action — and we still had a Double Main Event!
In the first of the two Main Events, TNA star Desmond Wolf came to the ring to a well-received response. He even gave Miss Sarah his shades as well. Nice touch. Then came the MCW Heavyweight Champion, Christian Vaughn — and oh sweet Molly Malone, what the hell was with his hair? Vaughn looked like he’d been mugged by Don King’s barber; his hair looked like a turkey’s tail had been transplanted on his head! This prompted a chant of “VAUGHN’S A FAGGOT” for several moments, to be replaced with the old “SHE’S GOT HERPES” chant for dear Minka. This didn’t sit well with either Vaughn or Minka (like anyone really cared; they still couldn’t get past that freaking head of hair!). Vaughn finally got in the ring, only to have Wolf muss with his hair a few times. Vaughn’s reaction earned him a new chant of “VAUGHN’S A PUSSY”. The match got underway at last, with Wolf in control. The momentum and control of the match went back and forth between the two of them, both giving as good as they got. Even the crowd was involved, with a “TNA – MCW” chant alternating between the sides of the ring. Minka even got herself involved a couple of times, taking a few shots on Desmond and even tripping him up as well. Wolf got Vaughn set up for his Tower of London finisher and hit it, then as he went for the pin, Minka distracted the referee long enough to allow Big Hurt to come out to the ring and pull the ref out as he went to make the count; Christian decked Desmond with a foreign object and went for his own pin — but to his shock, Wolf kicked out at two! Wolf then locked up Vaughn, who quickly tapped out — we had a new Heavyweight Champion! But hold the phone — Minka got in the ring and told something to the ref, who quickly reversed his decision and awarded the match to Christian Vaughn as the result of a disqualification! I’m no detective, but I’m willing to bet that Minka told the ref that Wolf had hit him seconds earlier. Desmond took the mic and said to Vaughn: “This is BullShit! If you have the guts, get back in and let’s do this right!” Vaughn’s answer was a 1-finger salute with each hand as he took his belt and headed for the back.
The ring crew came out and began removing the ring apron panels with the MCW logo on them, as well as spreading the assorted weapons provided by the fans. As it was announced at Holiday Hangover II, this “Fans bring the Weapons” match would be an unsanctioned match. And I must give the MCW fans credit — you guys got very creative with your contributions; you name it, it was out there or in the trash cans or the shopping cart.
Killer Sensation came to the ring first, followed by Brain Damage and Shasta. I am not exaggerating when I tell you that you could almost smell the violence in the air. When the bell rang, Brain Damage and Chris Kole started things off, but then Shane wanted in, calling for Shasta. Shasta called for a tag, Brain Damage shrugged, and tagged him in. Shane rolled past Shasta and hot-tagged Kole back in, then all proverbial hell broke loose! Shane attacked and bloodied the ref for no apparent reason, and the fight spilled out to the ring. Here it gets even more chaotic, so I’ll tell you what I can: Brain Damage decked Kole with the shopping cart. . .a golf club missed Kole’s head and sailed into the crowd (no one was hurt, but they were rather startled). . .Shasta broke a picture frame over Kole’s head. . .Kole used a keyboard on Brain Damage, who responded with a Baron Von Daschle Testicle Claw (a move rarely used by the Baron, I’m told). . .Shasta giving everyone his best Peter Townsend impression before blasting Shane with a guitar (which didn’t break for several blows. . .Brain Damage hitting Shane Sensation with a package piledriver. . .Shasta picking up Shane and delivering a Shasta Driver onto a trash can lid. . .Brain Damage dropping Chris Kole on the red coffin (which STILL didn’t break, although a panel popped out). . .and then Big Hurt, Luscious Larry Lavender, Mike Hercum, Jessicka Havok, Wilbur, Jebediah, Krazy (wearing a Buckaroo’s mask), Isaac Alter, Crew Spense, Supa Lucha, Eric Ryan, Aero, Otis, and GQ Status all came out to join the fight. . .a steel kitchen sink came into play. . .and so did Matt Cross and Toby Klein!
As you can guess, there was no clear winner — only possible survivors. . .woooo, what a night — and what a way to celebrate an anniversary!
Until next time, I am the Reverend Rogue Six, and in the words of The Most Interesting Man in the World, “Stay Extreme, my friends.” I’ll see you at ringside!
